Monday, December 29, 2008

Comedy Gold

I once shot a man in Reno just to watch him dry.
(It was a squirt gun.)

Monday, December 22, 2008

Screw You Junior

No, this in not aimed at my good friend Junior, a fine fellow if ever there was one.
But all them other Juniors like:
Hank Williams Jr.- blech!
Natalie Cole- (Nat King's Junior-ette) I have no use for her.
Dale Earnhardt Jr.- Scroll down a few to see what I think of that simp.
Freddie Prinze Jr. and Jacob Dylan- Boooooring, both of them, so boring they don't get their own insult and must share one.

There are exceptions to the rule: Arlo Guthrie is cool, as is Max Brooks and Hank Williams III, but now I have a new Jr. to add to may asshole list.
Tim Conway Jr. is a prick.

It pains me to say it. I loved his dad. I grew up watching the Carol Burnett Show, Tim Conway and Harvey Corman were amazing.
SO, why am I hating on this great funnyman's son? Well, I'll tell you. Inspired by folks like Conway I myself have entered the comedy business and it's been a good year. The tour I produce was booked into one of the top clubs in the country. We decided to promote the gig on radio and we set up some ticket give-aways in addition to our ads.

Let me paraphrase this obnoxious little Junior's giveaway. "Okay, call in and we got tickets to... it's something called (I'm leaving the name of my tour out, out of respect for my tour-mates) Comedy Tour at The (I'm leaving the clubs name out too). Okay, look folks, I don't select the prizes, I just have to give them away."

What the hell? I don't think he knows us or anything about the tour. He just hadn't heard of it yet and he is apparently a spoiled asshole who thinks it's cool to shit on people who throw the advertising budget that they have to work their asses off to have in the first place towards supporting his station and his show. What a dick. Sorry that us hardworking comedians didn't have famous dads to help us skip forward and we instead have to rely on actual talent. I mean really, your dad is Tim Fucking Conway and the best you can do is a crappy late night talk radio show? Enjoy it, I don't foresee you getting any bigger slice of the pie ya prick.

Tuesday, December 16, 2008

Happy Birthday Bryna

It's my wife's birthday. This is the first time I've been able to say that. :)
She is my center and I am so happy that she is. I love her and I love the life that we have built together.
If you know Bryna today would be a good day to say hello.