Monday, March 4, 2013

Movie Pitch Monday: Killing

Charlie finds out his best buddy Dean and his girlfriend have been having an affair. She has been going to see said friend at a local comedy clubs open mic night, then having sex with him in his van in the parking lot. Charlie is despondent. He considers suicide. Decides to do it in the van, so they find him. Puts a blade to his wrists, figuring that'll do a job on the upholstery. He can't go through with it. He's about to leave the van when Dean comes back.

Dean assumes he was waiting to attack him. Dean explains that she wanted to dump Charlie for him. Dean said "No way. He was just in it for the pussy. He doesn't need some "Crazy bitch" hanging on. Especially one who couldn't suck a dick worth a damn anyway. Charlie loses his temper, Dean loses lots of blood and then his ability to be alive. Dean pulls him into the van. In a daze he heads into the club, hiding his blood soaked hands. He washes up in the bathroom and comes out to see his girlfriend in the front row looking angry. The emcee calls for Charlie. Girlfriend looks about, annoyed. Emcee repeats Charlie's name. Emcee is about to go on when Dean speaks up, "Can I go up in his place." Emcee introduces Charlie.

"Sorry, I.. I haven't um, done this.... "

Heckler, "You suck!"

Charlie, "You know I could fucking kill you. I just killed Dean, thats why I'm here. I don't know that double homicide would put me in any worse a place than just regular old homicide. And really, killing a fat, stupid, drunk heckler is pretty excusable. Everyone knows you deserve it so, that might actually strengthen my argument that Dean deserved it to." the crowd cheers.

Charlie starts telling jokes about his recent suicide note "You can my records but, I'm taking all my pills. Toodles." and other dark subject matter. Has a decent set.

Charlie goes on the road. Kills a heckler, an asshole club owner, an abusive road comic who treats female fans like shit. All the while getting better and better at stand up, doing mostly dark material.

A cop is connecting the dots and starting to close in on Charlie.

End, cop is crossing golden gate bridge, finds Charlies car, finds a suicide note. Looks into the bay. Calls it in.

A comic built a lot like charlie is performing at a small roadside bar with strainers on his head, pretending to be a fly. A woman is heckling him hard. Zoom in on Fly's face...

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