Nilsson Shmilsson indeed

In a 2010 Rolling Stone Jenny Lewis gave her ten song playlist of 70's California rock. Fantastic playlist featuring many cool acts I'd not heard before like the awesome JJ Cale. The song that most grabbed me though was Me and My Arrow by Nilsson. I'd heard this song sampled by Blackalicious on their album NIA, but I had no idea where they'd gotten the sample from. I was in love and decided that Nilsson, who I'd previously, mistakenly disregarded as a bit of a novelty act, deserved to be re-examined. That was a couple of weeks ago. I've listend to nothing but Nilsson since.

Wow. Amazing voice, wonderful lyrics, the whole package. No wonder both John Lennon and Paul McCartney referred to him as their favorite American artist. There is a documentary on him that is pretty cool called Who Is Harry Nilsson (and why is everybody talking about him.) It's currently streaming on Netflix.

My one problem with the doc and with many of the people interviewed for it is how they seems to dismiss his work after Pussy Cats, the 1974 album he made with John Lennon where he blew out his voice, altering it permanently and greatly reducing his range. This was not the end. On the records that followed he was more experimental than ever, which in his case is really saying something, and like the Rick Rubin produced Johnny Cash albums a voice with some wear and tear can be used to great dramatic effect.

here is a play list of some of my favorite Nilsson songs. It was hard to choose, and I too lean heavily toward his older stuff but it's because I'm only in the last few days cracking into the later albums. I did include the wonderful tune Tango which is from Sandman, layed down a few years after he sacrificed his vocal chords at the alter of rock and roll. Nice that the tune starts with "Deep down in my soul, I hate rock and roll."
Enjoy:

Pinis Give Props!

A while back I posted about a certain issue of the comic Elfquest that, um, well, inspired me as a teenager. You can read that post here if I'm being too subtle for you. http://t.co/XIWxtZm

Last night I was THRILLED to get an email from the creators of Elfquest:

"ROFL doesn't begin to cover our reaction to your blog (May 25) about the infamous elf orgy in issue #17 of the original run of Elfquest."

I made my childhood heroes ROFL. That's awesome.

AFA Action Alert Alert

After this helpful AFA Action Alert told me how cool Home Depot is I decided I'd take their advice and write Chairman Frank Blake a letter. I used their letter as a template but did not use their online form, as I don't trust them so I emailed it from my own account. I'm also calling Home Depot, again at their advice: Home Depot's corporate phone number is 770-433-8211.


Email: consumeraffairs@homedepot.com
Subject: Thank You for Supporting Equal Rights, Diversity, and Tolerance

Dear Chairman Blake:

Your company's financial support of gay pride parades is exciting and encouraging to me.

However, Home Depot's decision to also include children's activities at these events is the best.

Gay pride events are known for their frequent displays of diversity and acceptance. By offering craft workshops specifically designed for children, Home Depot is encouraging their attendance.

Thus, they will likely be exposed to healthy environments. Good job!

I'm imploring you to continue putting the safety and well-being of our country first. Please continue supporting and participating in these kinds of events.

Sincerely,
Keith Lowell Jensen
Sacramento, CA
Zipcode: 95818

Bill Maher Is Coming To Sacramento

Who can NAME his show Politically Incorrect and still manage to get cancelled for being politically incorrect? That's our Bill Maher, and I love him, even when I disagree with him which does happen. Seriously Bill, anti-vaccination?

His show being canceled only seemed to push him more to speak his mind honestly and he started carrying the atheist banner loudly,  as loudly as anyone with his level of fame, getting his feature documentary Religulous into wide release.

And of course he is back on television with Real Talk, as brazen and outspoken as ever.

I'm super excited that Maher is coming to Sacramento.
The Details:
SacramentoAugust 19th • 8:00 P.M
Sacramento Community Center Theate
http://purchase.tickets.com/buy/TicketPurchase?agency=TDC&pid=7015160

Hittin' The Road

I'm currently booking my CD/DVD release tour in September and October. I've got dates locked in or almost locked in for Seattle, Chico, Sacramento, San Francisco.
Still working on LA area, maybe San Diego and Portland.
Open to any venues or cities you might suggest.
You can pre-order the DVD and CD here: www.KLJShop.com

The Secret To A Happy Life

Maybe its' a bit lofty for a comic, a comic with a day job even, but I am confident that I have found it, the key to a happy existence.

You must not lose touch with the ten year old you once were. People try not to grow up because they knew happiness as kids, or at least they think they were happy as kids. This is not what I'm advising at all. This is the path to being someone who is annoying to get stuck talking to at a party. Don't resist being thirty or forty or fifty but enjoy those ages the way the ten year old you would if he or she got to test drive your current life for a day.

Here is my life the way I unfortunately sometimes view it:


I am struggling to make a living as a comedian while working at a horrible day job. I love my wife and my baby but we don't get enough time together and much of the time we get together is spent dealing with the complications of modern working class life. We live in a rented apartment and a small one at that.

But put ten year old Keith behind the wheel:

DUDE, I GET TO DRIVE A CAR!!!
I'm married to a beautiful girl and SHE LETS ME TOUCH HER BOOBS! AND HAVE SEX! AND OTHER STUFF. No I'm not gonna tell you what other stuff, perv. You can buy the book.
And I do comedy and hang out with people like Robin Williams, yeah, FUCKING MORK FROM ORK. FOR REAL!
I have my own place, no parents. I eat what I want, when I want, go to bed when I'm tired. And I have a cute baby and she is super fun to play with. I don't give her spankings or yell at her. And my wife is super fun too and my baby has her own room which is good for when I want to touch my wife's boobs WHICH SHE TOTALLY LETS ME DO!!! UNDER THE SHIRT!!!
I have to go to work. That sucks. Beats the shit out of school though, that's for sure. And I get PAID!
I live in the future too which is crazy. Everybody has computers even portable ones and they are all linked together so you can just watch movies and listen to pretty much any song you can think of anytime you want and I have pen pals all over the world.
Yeah, life is rad.

You see how that works? Sorry ten year old me is such a potty mouth.

But... it's the Violent Femmes

That thing in the picture. That's a cassette tape.

Now, in the year 2011, I have a cassette player in my car.

I have a cassette player and AM/FM, no more.

I was thinking about that and remembering a time when I was a kid and I took great delight in ridiculing this thirty-something guy with a perm and lots of tight, faded concert shirts as he rocked out to his eight track player.

"Oh No!" I wondered "Have I become that guy, that cheesy walking anachronism?"

I try to defend myself to myself by saying, "But it's the Violent Femmes. That's pretty hip." and suddenly I can hear his voice crystal clear saying, "But dude, it's Graham Parsons."

The thing that seals the deal, the thing that assure me that I have indeed become he is that now, in hindsight, I realize he was right. Graham Parsons on 8-Track is actually pretty bitchin. Stupid smart mouth kids.

A Breakfast Miracle! Eye of Sauron Appears in Strawberry

I was just making breakfast. It had been a hard week. The kind of week where one could really use a pick me up from the dark one, but I was willing to settle for sharing some strawberries with my daughter. I was slicing them up, preparing to douse them in non-dairy yogurt (us evil types hate dairy) and lo and behold, I see THE EYE staring up at me. Sauron blessed our breakfast nook with a morning miracle appearing in the strawberry slice on our cutting board!!! I immediately preserved the blessed image for future generations. I expect throngs of pilgrims to arrive shortly. Maybe GoldenPalace.com will want to buy it, but they'll need to understand I am a deeply religious man meaning I'll require top dollar to part with my miracle strawberry slice!

Guess what I got today...

No, not herpes*... THIS:

*I really hope NOT herpes.

Steve O Shows Rescheduled for November

I just got good news, my friend DJ Mervyn and I will be performing with Steve O at Sacamento Punch Line November 17th through 20th.

The Hopping Wind Up Penis

Have you been to a bachelor or bachelorette party and seen the hopping wind up penises?


They're made in China, shipped out by the crate.


China knows the trouble we're in economically. They in fact hold much of our debt. They know that we're going broke. The also know that we continue to buy wind up hopping penises.


When we fall, they will believe that it is because we could not control our insatiable appetite for wind up hopping penises.


They will, at least in part, be right.